Disability
After delaying pursuing this process, I have decided it’s wisest to apply for disability given my current health limitations. Humbling! I will still be working towards launching The Stability App 🔼 but recognize the restrictions I face and inability to work a conventional job at this time.
For a while I still thought I could work in a typical role, but that unfortunately has proven not to be the case for this season. I trust that’s temporary.
Why post this here?
“For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
2 Corinthians 12:10 ESV
Here are the remarks from my application:
I have not been able to work a full-time job, especially in the last three years, as my health has deteriorated due to debilitating depressive episodes related to my Bipolar I disorder diagnosis and intensifying chronic pain that has not responded to an extensive variety of treatments. I have had unrelenting bouts of migraines for over 14 months that I have had assessed and treated without success. The pain and symptoms have been so severe that I’ve been completely bedridden for long periods at a time and unable to function.
I’ve seen at least seven different neurologists in the last two years, some at Penn Medicine, some at Jefferson Health and others at Methodist Hospital. I’ve made repeated visits to the emergency room to seek relief from the pain. I’ve tried a wide range of prescribed medication combinations, including different dosages, for pain management and mood stability. I was referred to Jefferson’s Headache Clinic, which is considered one of the top headache treatment centers in the world.
Upon Dr. H’s recommendation, I was admitted for intensive lidocaine IV treatment at Jefferson’s Methodist Hospital for the migraine diagnosis in October 2025. This treatment was unsuccessful, so they admitted me again for IV ketamine infusions, which also didn’t improve the pain. On a pain scale, my pain has consistently presented at a severity of 7, 8, 9 or even 10 out of 10 daily without any relief, forcing me to spend much of many months bedridden.
This has made it nearly impossible to plan for in-person work. Given the migraine symptoms, screens are especially challenging, and I need alternative accommodations for remote work. I have been able to briefly obtain these accommodations through a highly flexible arrangement working remotely for a close friend more recently, though for very limited hours.
Because I haven’t responded to the most aggressively prescribed oral medications, injections or IV treatments, Dr. H hypothesizes that this is not a classical migraine.
Therefore, I went to one of the leading treatment centers in the country, the Functional Neurology Brain Center of Florida, for treatment. While there initially appeared to be promising shifts, that treatment was unfortunately ultimately unsuccessful as well.
My pain syndrome, which remains in many ways a medical mystery to this day, has greatly diminished my quality of life in many capacities and rendered me disabled and unable to maintain full-time work, either in person or remotely. This pain intensified shortly after securing my first full-time job at LOGAN Hope School. While the job seemed like a terrific fit, my health was completely uncooperative. I needed to take multiple unpaid medical leaves from work. Then, when the pain continued to be so debilitating, I resigned from my full-time position, lost my benefits and worked part-time for very few hours in a flexible capacity with special accommodations. I struggled to complete even the most basic tasks, especially on higher-pain days, including routine emails and phone calls required for work.
I also have a chronic fatigue syndrome diagnosis. My energy levels have frequently been low enough to make basic tasks more challenging, let alone maintain a workload. If I’m experiencing a severe depressive episode on top of all of this, it depletes all of my remaining reserves.
When I was a senior in high school, I saw a leading expert on bipolar disorder at Sheppard Pratt who stated that I had “one of the nastiest cases of the illness he’s ever seen” and that he “was happy I am still alive” after I outlined my battles with suicidality and rapid mood cycling. In college, I needed to take six medical leaves of absence, each due to debilitating depression, and then left my full-ride scholarship.
During these medical leaves, I devoted all of my efforts to pursuing the best treatments available for bipolar disorder. I underwent electroconvulsive therapy, transcranial magnetic brain stimulation, cognitive behavioral therapy, dialectical behavior therapy, treatment programs and inpatient hospitalizations, and I explored every resource and medication available to try to get better.
I estimated a disability onset date of December 1, 2023, because it corresponds with the start of intensive ketamine infusion treatment, separate from the inpatient migraine treatment, that was highly recommended by my psychiatrists for my treatment-resistant depression. It was the tipping point at which my conditions prevented me from continuing to work.
Under these physical and psychological constraints, I have sadly had to conclude that it is no longer possible for me to expect to function at a full-time working capacity or financially support myself. Reluctantly, but out of necessity, I seek the help of Social Security and ask that I be granted disability benefits.